None of us actually beat our carpets or rugs to clean them any longer do we? That’s something we do with a vacuum cleaner nowadays isn’t it? Or rather something we have done for us by a willing submissive with a vacuum cleaner!
But having recently received The House of Eros “Carpet Beater” (above and below) from my favourite Toy Shop Uberkinky . . . I would certainly recommend you still make a place for one in your closet . . . or more likely your bedroom wardrobe!!!
When I first came across it’s very distinctive shape on the Uberkinky website, I thought it looked like a giant pretzel . . . and so was immediately intrigued, and curious, to find out more. Especially as I am always interested in adding more “impact” toys to my armoury!!!
Although I could tell it was quite a big implement from the measurements given on the Uberkinky product page . . . it wasn’t until the Postman turned-up on my doorstep with the carefully wrapped package, that I realised just how big it actually is.
The Carpet Beater measures 29 and a half inches from the bottom of the handle to the top rim of the spanking paddle. It is 8 inches across at the widest part of the paddle, and the reed-spokes are each about 8mm wide.
The diameter of the handle is about 1 and a half inches and is reasonably easy to grip. In fact, despite it’s size it is surprisingly light to handle because it is made from willow reeds.
The willow is nicely varnished so it is smooth to the touch when you rub ones fingers over it.
And, as you can see from my photographs, the way the reeds are interwoven around each other looks quite intricate and makes for an interesting design. It feels quite firm as well . . . so when I first unwrapped it . . . and ran the palm of my hand over the paddle . . . I was imagining with delight, the pretty patterns it might leave on my submissives bottom when I gave him his first spanking.
But that first session . . . a few days after opening my parcel . . . did leave me a little disappointed because in practice I felt it was actually a bit cumbersome to use, compared with my normal spanking canes and paddles.
Not because of the weight . . . as I mentioned it is actually reasonably light to hold . . . but I think possibly because of the width and shape of the paddle it is just not quite so easy for me to wield and swing.
And the harder . . . or more forceful . . . I tried to make the impact, the less control I seemed to have. And . . . as you can imagine . . . I do like to have complete control!!!
I was also a little disappointed that it didn’t make the patterned shapes that I had hoped it would . . . probably because I wasn’t able to land the paddle in exactly the same place with each smack. But it did leave lovely red blushes!
My submissive though . . . well he loved it . . . “It has a slightly springy-stingy impact” was the way he described it . . . without the intensity or immediate pain that my usual cane apparently does. And he was also able to take lots more strokes on each cheek than he could normally stand from my normal canes. That is probably because the shape and weave of the head “spreads” the impact rather than one specific thin stroke of a canes rod . . . and the spring of the willow-weave is far less rigid than a similarly shaped, hard wooden paddle.
So, as I say, I did find the Beater less comfortable and less natural for me to use at first. But . . . because he enjoyed it so much and has actually requested it in our two sessions since . . . I am becoming more and more proficient each time I use it.
I’m also experimenting with the way I hold the handle . . . even trying a two-handed grip to give the blows more force. And I do love the swishing sound it makes as I swing it . . . and then, of course, the smacking sound it makes as it whacks against his bum cheeks.
But I do wish I could get it to leave those lovely swirly-shaped patterns on his reddening bum!!! Still . . . you know what they say . . . “Practice makes perfect” . . . and I’m intending on practicing a bit more with a different submissive next week. So watch this space for regular updates . . . and, in fact, do keep checking my Video Channel at Clips Fatale regularly over the next few weeks as The Carpet Beater may well feature in my next video there (possibly chasing my sub around the living room swatting it against his naked bottom as he vacuums the rugs! I think I’ll entitle the video . . . “The Carpet Beater” (LOL!!)
So . . . would I recommend The House of Eros Carpet Beater as a worthwhile addition to your spanking sessions? Well it’s certainly different, and as with lots of House of Eros items, is certainly lots of fun . . . so yes . . . I most certainly would!
Modesty Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Impressive and interesting shape and completely different from my “normal” spanking toys.
Cons: Unusually wide size makes it difficult to pack into a toy bag or carry-case when travelling to one of my dungeon visits.
Material: Willow wood reeds with gloss varnish finish.
Length: Approximately 29.5 inches.
Width (at widest part on paddle): Approximately 8 inches.
Handle/shaft Diameter: Approximately 1.5 inches.
Vibration: Only when it immediately strikes it’s target area.
Lubrication: Not required.
Noise: Subtle swish on swinging. Nice smacking sound on impact.
Available Colours: Wood Brown.
Waterproof: Should not be used in the bath or shower.
After-care: Wipe thoroughly with cleaning cloth after use.
Supplier Product Link: Uberkinky House of Eros Carpet Beater
Additional Useful Link: House of Eros
Twitter feed: @
The House of Eros Carpet Beater was sent to me, free-of-charge, by Uberkinky for an honest and un-biased review.
The Modesty Rider:
I realise, of course, that there are already thousands of long-established Sex Toy Reviewers and Review sites . . . most of whom will be far more adept at explaining all the technical details and specifications of things. But for me, sexy clothes and lingerie, sexy toys . . . and even sexy books . . . are all about adding a little fun and excitement to things. So that is how I tend to approach my reviews and videos!!! Just to explain “how it was for me” in a fun, and light-hearted, way without taking things too seriously! Chances are that if something makes me giggle and tingle and feel good, it will score higher on my Modesty Rating.
Xxx – K