A sense of touch . . . a twist of passion . . . a shock of pain . . . a rush of blood
. . . a blur of emotions . . . a shout of excitement . . .
the joy of success . . . the sweet smell of release.
All our senses shared . . . all our senses spent.
This week’s Wicked Wednesday prompt is “Senses” . . . and you are are bound to find more senses-shared by clicking on Marie’s button below!
Xxx – K
Not a poem, nor a story, on this week’s Wicked Wednesday theme “A Flourish of Hate”. More a reflection on that little negative word we all use . . . and negative emotion . . . we all feel from time to time.
Sharing some heart-shaped “love-instead-of-hate” courtesy of Hubby’s bum!
Despite knowing better, I felt flickers of hate on Sunday morning when I awoke to an email from YouTube. Someone had complained to them about my video review of the Doxy Massager . . . so they had “removed” it from my Channel.
“How could they do that?” I ranted to Hubby, “I’m not naked in it, there’s not even any naughty words!!!”. I hated the injustice, I hated the complainer . . . and I hated YouTube!!!
“Calm down, count to ten” Hubby replied. “It was probably just someone having a bad day, maybe even one of Doxy’s competitors. The world won’t come to an end”.
And, of course, he’s right. It was just my momentary flicker of upset and outrage that someone could have taken offence at me talking about a vibrator! The video had over 6,000 views, so some people had obviously enjoyed it. And like all of my videos, I had meant it just as a slightly tongue-in-cheek, few minutes of fun. Meant to make people smile or even laugh out loud . . . I never mind people feeling I am silly, or embarrassing, or frivolous . . . but I would never want them to take offence.
Just as I would never want anyone to “hate” me just because I may find different things exciting and entertaining . . . and fun.
So I quickly got over my momentary lapse into flickers of anger (and took out my frustration on Hubby’s bottom instead). He was right, the world isn’t going to end just because someone disagrees with something I’ve said.
Hate flickers in all of us . . . that is only natural, BUT I would always hope and pray that it should remain just a “flicker” and that hate should never, ever “flourish”.
I’m sure you will find lots more interesting thoughts and experiences on this week’s theme by clicking on Marie’s button below!
Xxx – K
This week’s Wicked Wednesday prompt is “Communication” and as that was the subject of one of my posts from October of last year, I thought this would be an ideal opportunity to re-post it again in it’s entirety.
Because . . . of course . . . communication is always the key in anything we do, but most especially in our interaction with partners and our personal relationships with each other.
So . . . from October of 2013 . . .
A recent comment on one of my posts mirrors several emails I’ve received recently mentioning things along the lines of “I wish my wife was like you”.
I always try and respond with “well – do you talk with them about your feelings and desires? . . . Because, deep down inside, they MAY actually want to be someone different!!!”
Any relationship, no matter how much you actually love someone, can become routine and mundane. And, particularly if one is trying to balance the pressures and stress of bringing-up ones children, running the family home . . . and very probably going out to work as well . . . it can be incredibly tiring and draining.
I know that despite the fact that we’d always had a fun and adventurous relationship, and despite my Hubby always encouraging me to express my deepest feelings right from the very beginning, I still felt it hard to completely “open-up”, or even admit to myself, the things that really excited me. Perhaps it was my Catholic upbringing. Perhaps a lack of self-confidence. Perhaps a fear of being rejected.
So I couldn’t admit to feeling flattered, and excited, and interested by the approaches of other men. And despite all the feelings of guilt and probably initially at least, shame . . . I found myself embarking on an office affair. It was an escape, a distraction, a release from my “ordinary” life. And it was a thrill and an excitement I just couldn’t deny.
And yet . . . I also couldn’t deny those feelings of guilt and deception . . . and the moment I felt I had to “confess my sins” was one of the most frightening moments of my life. But instead of exploding in fits of rage Hubby insisted he knew that I had been seeing someone else, almost from the start. He told me he loved the fact that I could experience that excitement, and difference, and fun . . . and that it simply enriched our lives.
That moment was truly life-changing. Realising that we could both share absolutely everything about ourselves, all our deepest personal secrets, desires and needs, was an incredible feeling.
Of course it didn’t change our lifestyle overnight. We still had all those normal, everyday, pressures. The work, the home . . . and the children. But suddenly that one emotional, heart-wrenching conversation meant that nothing could come between us. If we could talk so openly, and understand, and share each others sexual desires and needs, we could talk and understand anything and everything.
My affair continued and my new-found “freedom” meant I was able to meet and develop other relationships over the coming months and years. My sharing all of the details with Hubby of my “evenings out” grew and developed with an almost natural unplanned progression into him meeting several of my lovers. Then into him actually joining us . . . then into Swingers Clubs . . . then into . . .
And the more we shared, the more we talked, the stronger our relationship became . . . and it continues still !!! Our life just continues to get better . . . and more fulfilling, and more exciting . . . and more fun.
Why am I telling you all this???
Because . . . I understand how difficult it can be sometimes to just open-up and tell someone we really love, just what we really, really feel inside. Particularly about sex! Why is it that we find something so natural, so basic, so fundamental, so difficult to talk about? If we can only just put aside all those feelings of guilt, shame . . . and jealousy . . . we can unlock not only ourselves, but also those nearest and dearest to our hearts. It may not be easy, and certainly those feelings of jealousy may be the single most difficult factor to overcome. But perhaps just communicating those ideas to each other may open up new areas of fun and excitement.
So . . . communication is the key!!! Talk to your partner, your husband, your wife.
Maybe THEY want to be that someone that YOU want them to be too . . . !!!
For even more of this Wednesdays communications, simply click on Marie’s button below!
Xxx – K
P.S. – Thank you to the wonderful John Tisbury, (see my side-bar), for my photo-silhouette above.
She recognised him the moment he stepped through the door. He didn’t have that same arrogant look, the jutting jaw, the assured swagger of the last occasion she’d seen him in the flesh as he’d strode past her desk towards the Executive Suite. But she knew from his eyes and those silvery streaks in his fringe. It was definitely him, definitely Nigel.
His profile, and the face pictures she’d requested when he’d contacted her from her Fetlife account, hadn’t given her any clues. They were just as all the other profiles, friendship requests . . . and bookings for her services . . . that she would always receive. Darkened, out-of-focus, selfie-mobile phone pictures either taken too close-up and out-of-proportion, or too distant and blurry to give an exact indication of the individuals “normal” identity.
Even when she’d asked him to call, as she always insisted, and they’d spoken for a few minutes on her mobile, she hadn’t recognised his voice. Nervous and slightly echoey . . . as these first calls so often were . . . their short conversation hadn’t triggered any alarms, any memories.
But it was definitely him, definitely Nigel.
He didn’t recognise her of course . . . after all, in her five years at the company, they’d never spoken in person. She was just another PA to one of his junior-managers in marketing, another faceless emailer from the third floor. Just a name, a convenient scapegoat, along with her department manager, who would “just have to be let go” when that contract had been approved and signed with one zero, one apparently very important zero . . . before the decimal point . . . had been left off the final paperwork.
“How could it happen?”
“Weren’t these things checked and re-checked?”
“Weren’t the minutes cross-referenced and listened to again and again?”
“They’ll have to be let-go. Replaced! All of them! The whole department!”
It had been a huge shock at the time. Unexpected and cruel. But in one of those wonderful twists of fate . . . one of those life-changing turns in the road . . . she’d risen to the challenge of one of her, very drunken, colleagues at their unofficial, enforced, post-redundancy drinks sessions.
“Why don’t you become a Mistress? You know how you hear about all those suits and execs that like to be dominated and whipped and spanked before they go home to shout at their poor wives and kids?”
And now . . . 18 months on . . . now, in one of those wonderful twists of fate, here was Nigel . . . sorry, “SubNeil71” . . . stepping over the threshold of her dungeon door.
“Now, SubNeil71, I want you to count down . . . one nip, one bite, one swipe, one pull-of-the-chain at-a-time . . . One Hundred Thousand and Ten . . . One Hundred Thousand and Nine . . . !!!!”
Why am I telling you this story? Well, because this week’s theme at Wicked Wednesday is all about other women who have been fired from their job for getting a number wrong. But, take it from me ladies, all is not lost . . . a change can often be good news . . . For Some !!!
And I think you might find more counting and re-counting, from tap-tap-tapping on Marie’s button below!
Xxx – K
P.S. Any resemblance to real-life instances of Nigel’s or Neil’s, is purely co-incidental, unexpected . . . and unintentional!!!
Filed under Wicked Wednesday
Being away on holiday means it is sometimes necessary to improvise . . . and experiment . . . at playtime!
And as this week’s theme at Wicked Wednesday is all about Photographs, I thought I would let the picture tell the story.
I’m sure you will be able to see lots of other interesting photographs from Marie’s button below!
Xxx – K
Filed under Wicked Wednesday
Doubt and uncertainty?
Apprehension? Expectation?
Adrenalin? Excitement? . . .
Of course!
Fear? Distrust? Dread? . . . or worse?
No never . . . Because???
Those whispering words in my ear,
those teasing touches across my breasts and thigh,
that soft kiss and flicking tongue across my lips,
the swish of the whip through the air,
. . . and that devilish smile
enchant and excite all the while!
I tingle and twist . . . both inside and out!
Wanting that pleasure and pain that I’m certain to enjoy!
And of that . . . I’m in no doubt!!!
Read about all the other Doubts expressed and dispelled from the Wicked Wednesday button below!
Xxx – K
Filed under Wicked Wednesday
I was recently asked what I “get out of blogging” . . . and “what I hope anyone reading me might get from my posts”.
And in a way that ties-in with today’s theme at Wicked Wednesday, of what we’ve learned from our past and how we apply that to our future . . .
Because although I started my Modesty Ablaze Diaries really just on a whim . . . as a bit of a joke, almost a sort-of “I could do that” dare in a way . . . the website quickly became something much more important than a joke or a dare.
Yes, of course at first I was flattered (and very surprised) to suddenly start receiving emails and comments from all over the world. We all have an ego and like being told nice things about ourselves don’t we! But actually hearing from other people about how my diaries and experiences were actually helping people in their own relationships . . . or at least motivating or encouraging them to want to change things or perhaps communicate more with their own partners . . . was wonderfully fulfilling and rewarding in a way I’d never imagined.
It made ME feel good to know that I was, if only in some small way, making other people feel good. Other people whom I would probably never ever meet in normal, everyday, life. Knowing that sharing some of the enjoyment and satisfaction from my own lifestyle could possibly help others experience something similar . . . or at least make it just a little easier to express their own desires, their own needs and wants.
Because sharing in any sense of the word . . . whether it be with our own loved ones, family and friends or with perfect strangers whom we may meet once and never again (or perhaps in today’s internet-world with people we may never meet at all) . . . can be such a wonderful and fulfilling emotion.
Through Modesty Ablaze I have now met, both physically-in-person, and just across the ether, some wonderful and inspiring people within what I suppose would be described as the “erotic community”. People such as Marie here at Wicked Wednesday, Kay Jaybee, Molly at Sinful, Curvaceous Dee, John Tisbury (who took my picture below), the Sh! Girls, MsQuote, Sarah at MLNP, and so, so many others. People who have inspired me, whose company or thoughts and expressions and experiences I enjoy and take motivation and inspiration from.
But I am sure none of them would mind me saying that it is those occasional emails or messages from people whom I have never met, and never will, who tell me that my sharing has helped, or made an impression, on their lives.
For me the most important, fulfilling, satisfying thing about life is making it enjoyable and fun . . . and sharing that with others in the hope that some of that fun and enjoyment may rub-off.
That is what I have learned from my past . . . and that is the most over-riding feeling that I get from my occasional Modesty posts. And, of course, I hope that sense of fun will be what others get from reading my posts or watching my videos.
If I can make people smile, laugh out loud occasionally and feel good about themselves (and hopefully feel good and more understanding of others) then I will feel happy both about my past and for my future.
Read about all the other Past and Future thoughts at this week’s Wicked Wednesday from the button below!
Xxx – K
P.s. – With thanks to John Tisbury (see my sidebar) for my photograph above.
Filed under Wicked Wednesday
As I mentioned in a recent post I’m finding it so difficult to balance all my time and motion at present. Motion in the sense that I’m loving life so much I just can’t seem to find enough Time to type all my thoughts out on my keyboard.
So I am completely Stumped trying to come-up with some words for this week’s Wicked Wednesday prompt on being the “last tree standing”.
But I do love trees, so I’m hoping that this picture . . . taken in the wickedly entangling roots of one of my favourite trees . . . will suffice.
But there will be lots of enchanting, and entangling, tree stories available at Wicked Wednesday from the button below!
Xxx – K
Filed under Wicked Wednesday
Shame is such a strong word isn’t it? An emotion that almost seems a natural part of our personality, one of our earliest memories, one of our earliest fears. And it is such a negative word . . . a negative feeling . . . a feeling of fear and uncertainty that can actually be very shameful in itself. Is there a word, or meaning, for that? A double-negative? No, that’s not it . . . but I hope you will know what I mean . . .
Feeling shameful about a spur-of-the-moment deed or perhaps a reaction or argument with a friend or colleague that you almost immediately regret, is one thing. An apology and words of “so sorry, I really didn’t mean to be like that” can . . . and should . . . convey ones true feelings of sorrow for those momentary lapses in our patience, and temper, that we all suffer from.
But I think that far too often shame is used as such a hurtful and unnecessary emotion. Something used to restrict our right to express ourselves freely and openly about the choices we make in our normal everyday lives. Beliefs, fashion, food, sexuality . . . all of the things that are personal, and important, to the way we want to live our lives.
Thankfully, through Memes such as Wicked Wednesday some of us are able to express our own feelings through words and . . . for some like myself who find words more difficult to come by of late . . . pictures.
And that can make us feel closer to one another and give us a sense of belonging and sharing . . . and help us to celebrate our lifestyle, rather than to feel a sense of guilt or shame about it.
To me, as long as the fun is genuine and consensual . . . and not harmful or taking advantage of anyone other than ourselves . . . then the “rest of” society would be a much better, more open and a much more fun place.
Feeling shameless!!! . . . (I used to worry about others seeing my body . . . until I discovered memes such as “Wicked Wednesday”, “Sinful Sunday” and “Scavenger Hunt”).
So let’s celebrate ourselves . . . our bodies . . . our experiences and desires . . . our lifestyles . . . and not let ourselves be made to feel any sense of shame!!!
There are more thoughts and experiences about shame at this week’s Wicked Wednesday from the button below!
Filed under Wicked Wednesday
This weeks theme at Marie Rebelle’s wonderfully Wicked Wednesday is “Flight Attendants, Champagne and First-Class”.
Well, all of our Flight Attendants here at Modesty Airways are expected to always provide a First Class Service . . .
. . . serving welcoming glasses of champagne and wine . . .
. . . and an appetising entrée in our First-Class Departure Lounge . . .
. . . and, of course, attending to every passengers personal needs before, and after, take-off.
You can read much more about other first-class travel experiences this Wicked Wednesday by pushing the button below!
Filed under Wicked Wednesday
Click on my “Modesty Unmasked” cover above, for more information on all my Hotwife Diaries, and FREE “Balcony Members” access.
Click my Cover above for printable PDFs of my Hotwife Diaries at Gumroad.
The Modesty Ablaze Diaries