I’m sure we all have “Skeletons in the Closet”, some so personal and private that we would never wish for them to be disclosed.
But opening up my own skeleton (this week’s theme at Wicked Wednesday) led to the most wonderful, emotional release that changed my life forever . . . and for the better!
I left home and moved in with my husband-to-be at just 19, not long out of school . . . but swept off my feet. Life was fun and fulfilling and we married two years later. Pre-children, and with Hubby working seven days a week starting a new business, I slowly began finding myself bored with my evenings-alone home-making and decorating our new flat. And with more and more time on my hands
. . . a new job of my own gave me new interests and new friends, one of whom was rather dishy! Lunchtime coffees, turned into after-work drinks. And after-work drinks turned into after-work meals . . . and, somehow, after just a few weeks, I suddenly found myself involved in an extra-marital affair.
It wasn’t that I’d fallen out of love with Hubby, it wasn’t that our own sex had become unfulfilling or routine . . . it was just that someone else desired me, flattered me, interested me and I found that interest, and flattery exciting and entrancing . . . and I just couldn’t resist.
Of course I felt terribly guilty after each meeting . . . telling myself each time that it would be the last. But I couldn’t stop myself and the affair continued. After all, it wasn’t as though I expected, or even wanted, a permanent relationship with my new lover. I didn’t want to change my life, or his. We both knew the times we were together were just something different and exciting and just-for-the-moment. And the fact that sex with Hubby immediately after a meeting with my lover, seemed to reach new heights of lust and passion, just added to the excitement of my secret life.
But . . . as time passed and the excitement of our lover-liaisons began to assume almost a normalcy of their own . . . those nagging feelings of guilt began to return. I was cheating on someone I truly loved . . . I was living a lie. I knew it wasn’t right, it wasn’t how it was supposed to be.
I can still remember the evening I told Hubby I was having an affair . . . still remember the song he was playing on the stereo as I sat down beside him on the sofa . . . still remember his question “Well, do you want to tell me something?”
I blurted out my “confession” . . . thinking all the while that it would shatter our world, that he would explode with feelings of betrayal and that it would be the end of our marriage. But INSTEAD Hubby told me he’d suspected it for months, not knowing the who or where, but suspecting the when and how often.
And to my amazement, he said he not only understood my feelings of flattery and excitement . . . and my giving-in to temptation . . . he actually wanted me to continue the relationship, to continue to enjoy the freedom and excitement of what was mine, and only mine, to give. The fact that he wasn’t jealous, wasn’t outraged or upset . . . was just the most wonderful, emotional and loving feeling I had ever felt.
That moment changed our lives and I truly believe, made our relationship EVEN stronger and more loving and more fulfilling than either of us could ever have imagined.
That day was over 27 years ago! The affair with Lover No.1 continued, with Hubby and he meeting and becoming friends. And over the years since there have been many more lovers . . . and many more wonderful and incredible adventures . . . and new chapters that still continue to open before us.
And when I often . . . very, very often . . . think how wonderfully fun, and loving, and exciting our years together have been, I thank God that I did open my Closet Doors and exorcise that Skeleton!!!
You are sure to find many more Skeletons in The Closet by gently knocking on Marie’s button below!
Xxx – K
